♈ Aries (March 21 - April 19)
Your pet is basically in boot camp. You’re out here trying to teach them advanced tricks like they’re training for the Olympics. Sit? That’s too easy. Your dog knows how to fetch you a LaCroix from the fridge and do your taxes. Chill, Aries, not every pet is built for competition.
♉ Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Your pet lives better than most people. They have multiple beds, gourmet treats, and a daily massage. You have seriously considered getting them a matching pajama set. Let’s be real, if anyone deserves luxury, it’s them.
♊ Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
You have full-blown conversations with your pet. You’re giving TED Talks, asking them for life advice, and acting shocked when they don’t answer. Also, you definitely gave them at least three different nicknames that make no sense.
♋ Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
This isn’t just a pet. This is your child. You tuck them in at night, you sing to them, and if anyone says anything slightly negative about them, you will fight. They could literally destroy your entire couch, and you’d be like, “Aww, it’s okay, baby.”
♌ Leo (July 23 - August 22)
Your pet is famous. They have their own Instagram, themed photoshoots, and probably more followers than you. You throw them birthday parties, complete with a cake and guest list. You’re convinced they love the attention, and honestly, they do.
♍ Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Alright, Virgo king, let’s be real—you treat your pet like they’re an employee, and you run the most efficient household ever. You’ve got their meals on a schedule, their vet visits pre-booked, and their toys organized by size and function. If they make a mess, you’re side-eyeing them like, “This was not in the daily plan.” But lowkey, you’re also the type to have deep convos with them at 2 AM like, “You’re the only one who really gets me.
♎ Libra (September 23 - October 22)
You let your pet run the house. They sit wherever they want, eat when they feel like it, and honestly, you ask them for permission to sit on your own couch. You wanted a cute aesthetic pet, but somehow, they became the boss of you.
♏ Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
Your pet is your ride or die. You tell them all your secrets, and if anyone messes with them, it’s over. You definitely have a deep telepathic connection with them, and you’re fully convinced they understand everything you say.
♐ Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Your pet is out here living an adventurer’s life. Hiking? Done. Beach days? Obviously. Spontaneous road trip? They’re in. Your pet has seen more places than most people, and they love the chaos just as much as you do.
♑ Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
You are running a pet empire. Your dog has the best obedience training, the fanciest food, and a strict routine. You mean business, and somehow, your pet is the most well-behaved animal on the planet. Meanwhile, everyone else’s pet is out here acting like a menace.
♒ Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
Your pet is... different. You didn’t get a cat or a dog like everyone else. No, you have something wild—a lizard, a bird, or some exotic pet no one else has ever heard of. You love explaining why they’re so misunderstood.
♓ Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
You and your pet are just vibing. They sleep in your bed, you definitely have matching emotional breakdowns, and you play sad music together like you’re in a dramatic indie film. You and your pet understand each other on a soul level.